(recommended reading for expectant parents choosing names!)

Me, 1961

First, let’s unpack the title of this essay. I admit to feeling uncomfortable appropriating the word “decolonize” because of my sympathy for indigenous people all over the globe whose lands, lives and bodies have been colonized. …


From a family portrait I commissioned in 1997 when I first began to worry about Tiger’s mortality!

I killed the love of my life.

He was a nineteen year old cat and it was an accident, but I am still haunted seventeen years later.

Tiger was my first child, my first daughter’s first playmate and the best bed partner I have ever had. He was born to…


THANK YOU, Nkem and Rae, for putting this so clearly in an easy to share place!


Malcolm X was murdered on this day in 1965 when I was five.

I remember hearing only that he was murdered “by his own people,” so I grew up thinking this was the reason it had less impact than the murder of MLK, Jr. a few years later. When I…


My condo front door, of which some neighbors disapprove!

I’ve never been a fan of New Year’s resolutions, but this year, I’ve made two.

My first resolution; everything I write going forward will come with privilege identifiers.

I have come to understand how important it is for the dismantling of systems of oppression to acknowledge and check ones own…


(I feel empowered when I wear this Mary Engelbreit t-shirt!)

I am sharing this very personal letter publicly to illuminate an aspect of systemic complicity and the connection between micro and macro aggressions of repression.

Dear person I love whose profile pictures/party invitations include my abuser/oppressor,

Thank you for the invitation to attend your upcoming celebration, but I must decline.


My Monster is WORDS!

(This was written in response to the prompt; “who or what is/are your monster/s?”)

The spoken and unspoken, the compassionate and the cruel, mine and others’.

Oh sure there are other monsters in my life, (the internalized patriarchy, sleeplessness, death, illness, suicide, my sensitive digestive system…


I’m in the purple pussy cap with 2 daughters and 2 friends!

When Politics is Personal

On January 20, 2017, my eldest daughter and I hosted an event with 30 millennial women, mostly Georgetown University Law classmates of hers, called, “Self Care for Heartbroken Goddesses.” The invitation read, “We thought we were getting the first POTUS with a vagina and instead we got one who brags…


I spent December waiting. How is it possible that no one with more gravitas as a thinker/writer than me thought to submit the most obvious word of the year?

I am not talking about the strict legal definition of aiding and abetting in criminal activity, but the more colloquial meaning…

Suzy Anand Garfinkle

Mom, Muse, Motivator, Writer, Empathy Advocate…

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